Bella Ciao
BELLA CIAO They say one night in Bandra can change your life, and trust me they’re not wrong. Oh, wait, I haven’t even introduced myself, my bad !! I’m Money…yep an actual crisp note, fresh from the Reserve Bank, still smelling of ink and possibility. How I reached Bandra is a journey in itself… well brace yourself , after I was born in reserve bank I was stacked neatly in a bundle, then I was transformed to a far off bank , after that I found myself in the calloused hands of a farmer, travelled all the way to Punjab, slipped into a taxi, and somehow ended up here, in Bandra, resting in the pocket of a taxi wallah. Crazy, isn’t it? Eeee—thump! I felt the taxi stop . Ohhh am I being transferred again? Wait… yes, I think I am. Just then a soft hand picked me up… oh it’s a womans ? “Thank you,” she said in a tired voice ; oh lorddy she reeked of sleep deprivation and caffeine overdose. Before I could blink I was shoved down to her oversided cute avocado chibi print totebag ….AVACADO SERIOUSLY !!!! {in her defense it was on sale } From RBI to being jammed between leftover graniola bar and ink dripping pens ,NO THANKYOU ,if this is not hell then I don’t know what it is . --Ringgg ringgg--. “Hello sir, yes, I just reached Bandra. Don’t worry, I have everything under control. The gala will be perfect tonight. I’ll begin the prep as soon as possible, Thank you.” Ooooo, did I hear gala? Isn’t that for the rich? Am I going to a gala? What should I wear , a velvet suit or a classy black one with a bow tie and a slicked-back hairstyle? Finally, a wardrobe change for me. Woooohoooo! Tonight I’m gonna rock and roll…and maybe end up in jail too, because tonight I will steal your hearts, ladies. Beep beep… okay great , why are my fantasies always interrupted? I’m money, not a Wi-Fi signal!!!! Why is there so much traffic here? It reminds me of My days in Delhi …. it was the WORST . I couldn’t tell if it was mist or dust. Thank goodness I stayed their only a month before being transferred to another bank in Kolkata; otherwise my lungs would’ve turned black. And for the record, I don’t smoke if I did infact smoke I would tigger ADHD… well, iykyk. . “Ooooooo, did I just smell vada pav? Oh, she’s got great taste in food, though. And yes the avocado design offended me. Okay, you got me. I don’t really eat food… but hey, do humans eat me? Because I’ve heard of this saying: once you get a taste of money, you can’t get over it. I guess that means I’m Michelingraded. Totally not bluffing . “Hey, take your greasy hands off me. I’m being transferred again …why am I always the one picked? Hmph. ‘Being 20 rupees is not bad,’ they said. ‘Thank you, madam ji.’ Great, now I’ve got sweat and grease on me at the same time, and can anyone explain why I’m in a cookie box that is supposed to be for COOKIES? And why is the vada pav wala smiling at me? Usually people used to smile and even give heart eyes to my brother, the 500, but hey, this is new and I am totally not freaking out. ‘Now I have enough to buy my son his uniform.’ Wait… that was sweet—awww—wait, did I just aww? No, pfttt, that was definitely not me Just when I was about to drift off to sleep peacefully, I was jolted awake by the cookie tin falling down. OKAY, WHAT NOW?!!! I heard the pav bhaji wala crying, “PLEASE STOP, SIR! Don’t do this to me my wife is dying, my son is only five, and we don’t even have any money to last this month. Please don’t destroy this shop! This is all I have. Being poor is the worst ” Then I heard another man’s voice, laced with anger… “Saale gareeb! How many times do I have to say this? Move out of the way. Mr. and Mrs. Advani are hosting a gala tonight, and they don’t want their guests to notice any gareebs. There will be international guests. Our superiors ordered it, and the PM gave instructions directly. Jcb destroy the shop now ” I was now laying on the muddy ground and I am pretty sure many stepped on me , I could hear the screaming sounds of the man in the background blurring , all I could see is sky somehow it was not going to rain but still looks a bit dark . Is this the end , they say before you die you will get flashbacks of your life am I going to heaven or hell ? ……. Am I hallucinating or why is a kid picking his nose staring at me …….Hey shoo staring is rude …… OH no no no don’t you dare pick me up ….. oh come on….. “ mummy look at what I found ” “ Bittu Beta what did I say abouit taking things from the ground “ Yeah, you heard your mum right… kid, put me down… can he even hear me? I was going to die in peace. Just then, she took the money from her son’s hands, looked around at the others, and SHOVED ME INSIDE HER BAG. “Ek pal ka jeena, phir to hai jaana ” ….. okay now I am in the car maybe going to their home and … the lady got an awesome taste in music … “ mummy change this song please , this is so 90s coded play the weekend please ” Okay that was lowkey offensive because – “ hey this song is a bop okay when this was released everywhere we could only hear this and omg should I even have to say about the greek god haha “ Yes girl preach “ mummy atleast put the radio please ” Okay this kid is a brat “okay fine bittu ” Radio : Namaskar. The Finance Minister said in Parliament today that she will increase the tax by 2 percent. She stated that this measure is aimed at addressing air pollution and cleaning the Ganga River. Screech—halt! The car came to a stop. The lady looked as if she was ready to throw her hands at the radio. “Okay, what now? Another increase in tax? All they do is tax us and never make any real changes. Everywhere there is corruption, and we have to pay money for the poor… and now we have to pay even more because the rich can’t? Why are we always squeezed? Being middle class is the worst we’re constantly running on deadlines!” Wait this sounds familiar …. KRAAASHHH! Could this day get any worse for me . I heard a knock on the glass, and the next thing I know, a tall handsome man who looked like he was in his early twenties and the lady were at each other’s throats. I almost choked to death because Bittu was squeezing the bag a little too tight. “Wait till my daddy hears about this you’ll be dead meat!” the man said. The lady screamed back, “Oh, what is your daddy going to do? Kill me?” The man growled, “Oh, you’re asking for it.” Now having had enough, the lady snatched the bag from Bittu’s hand, PICKED ME up, and threw me in the guy’s face. “Take this, twenty, rich brat!” she shouted, and drove off. Their was an akward silence … I was staring at the man , the man back at me and was interrupted by honking sounds .. oh we were still in the road “ hat saale ” the man just tsked and got into his car – oh holy onions is that a buggati I though it was a myth it exits …. The man put me inside his pocket and started driving the car . he spoke to himself as he drove “ rupees 20 exist .. why do people even need a 20 ?” Woah okay that was offensive rich boy …. Wait a min its NIGHT already but what about the gala oh I should a just been with the even management lady I would have been at the gala now Woah, okay, that was offensive, rich boy… Wait a minute it’s night already! But what about the gala? I should have just stayed with the event management lady I would have been at the gala by now charming the ladies . Just then I hear him mutter again “Stupid gala, stupid car! I just want this day to end already. Why do I have to attend a dumb gala? I could have been in Brazil, partying with my friends. I hate those fake smiles and conversations… ‘Oh, you’re Mr. Advani’s son, the next CEO, huh? Are you going to surpass your daddy?’ Dad is probably plotting to get richer than the Mehtas . Ugh, being rich is the worst you can’t even be free.” Okay what is the topsy turvy now who has it worse the poor the middle or the rich ….. I wish I could say I have it worse cause I am literally holdind my breath right now cause your car perfume stinks boy .Wait is that a palace woahh why is it decorated with lights and why is their a literal golden statue of an old man like made of gold . oh there is a huge hot air balloon flating saying 100 years of advani group charity gala . WAIT THIS IS THE GALA AND HE IS THEIR SON . I haven’t even got dressed , how will I charm the ladies . damn me . He stepped out of his car and began walking ….. boy I am lirweally fighting for my life I am only haldf a minute from falling from your pocket . I think he felt that too cause he picked me up and looked at me like … I was the most annoying person in the world . Hey I might be loud , noisy but never annoying …. Okay maybe a little fine . he looked at the foundain near the entrance ….. a charity foundain …. Oh no I know what you are think don’t do it I am a note not a coin NOOOOOOOOOOOO too late he threw me into that and went It’s been exactly one hour and twenty minutes since he threw me here, and somehow I’m still floating… The moon looks awfully bright tonight, and I think it’s dance time, because Mozart is playing now. I can’t help but wonder about the people I saw today. The vada pav guy looked at me as if I’m the most precious item in the world. The mom lady was frazzled, juggling her son and me, clearly stressed out. And the Advani’s son… well, he looked at me like I’m trash . . Atleast now I am off for charity from the foundain. .Now I can sleep peacefully finally for the day good nigh- Hey did a BIRD DROPPING FELL ON ME I HATE THIS DAY [ a month later ] Guess what? I’m not in some noble charity fund helping poor kids or saving the planet… nope. I’m lounging in the personal account of the Advanis. Yep, that’s right I skipped the whole philanthropy gig and went straight to the VIP lounge of rich people’s wallets. I never even got a single transfer into any charity fund. What a life, huh? Bella ciao fellas By Leona biju